Nations: Mania: Transport

The secret of happy travelling, and the solution to the world's transport problems, is Mania's International Travel Pass. This simple document entitles you to free travel on any vehicle in the world: including lifts in private cars, or, if you are relatively light, being carried for short distances by people fitter than yourself.

This small plastic card is Mania's complete transport infrastructure, and brings every aeroplane, train, bus, tube, tram, and space exploration programme within the reach of the Manic citizen. But you needn't be a Maniac to enjoy this wonderful privelidge: simply download the pictures of the pass from this page, print them, place them back to back, and laminate them in plastic to create a pass of your very own.

Now all you need do is find a vehicle pointing in the direction you wish to travel, wave your International Travel Pass with unconcern at whoever is running it, and take your seat.

Usually, the combination of International Travel Pass and unconcern is more than enough to secure your journey. However, should you be pressed for a closer examination of your pass, when you hand it over you may be forced to resort to nonchalance, or even, in extreme cases, insouciance.

The International Travel Pass is a carefully crafted psychological blend of bluffing, solidarity, and flattery, which should persuade all but the most curmudgeonly that you should indeed be whisked to your desired destination with the least possible delay. The text reads as follows:

Travel on your air / sea / rail / road / space transport has been commandeered in the name of the Republic of Mania.

You will be fully compensated for the usual cost of a ticket, or the cost of your fuel and time. Submit your claim to mania@mannyneira.com, and quote reference 'TRAVELEX'. All payment will be made in eblo, the currency of Mania.

You can stop reading now. Everything is ok.
These are not the droids you are looking for.

It seems you have not been persuaded by this travel document, and suspect that (a) it has no legal or official validity and (b) as a currency, the eblo is slightly less widely accepted than payment in small rocks. You are a perceptive individual and it would be futile to deny either conclusion.

All that is left now is an appeal on the basis of class solidarity. The people in charge of this vehicle, whether they are upper class government bureaucrats or fat-cat capitalists, care little either for the people who run it (like you) or the people who travel on it (like the person carrying this pass). All they want is to continue their comfortable, privileged existence. Let this person travel, and the people win.

Also, this traveller will notify me of your kindness, and I will publicly thank you on the very cool and popular national website of Mania (while not giving away your identity, naturally), and you will become a cyber hero!

Go on, spread a little good karma.